I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been giving me lately!
Time flies whether or not you're having fun.
Skydivers: good to the last drop.
We can learn a lot from people who keep their mouth shut.
Marriage means commitment. Of course, so does insanity.If God wanted us to be thin, food wouldn't taste so good.
Many of our ambitions are nipped in the budget.
A great many people confuse their lack of planning with an emergency.
If you're doing the speed limit, you're in the way.
Forget the whales, save the cowboy.
He's one person who would make a perfect stranger.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
The only people truly under the weather are buried.
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